Now and Then

Yesterday was a cold, snowy spring day so the kids and I spent some time looking at pictures. When I found this picture of Sam and a very young Leo (10 years ago), it reminded me of a recent picture we took of Sam with a very young Cloe (who's actually still very young!)

Our Sam has always loved animals, but in particular, dogs. I just love these pictures of him. You can tell from the look on his face in both photos just how excited he is to have this puppy in his life.

I also love the black cowboy boots he's wearing in this picture of him with Leo. In an attempt to be just like dad, he used to wear those constantly. He wore them the first time we went to Disneyland and got horrible blisters, because unbeknownst to Chip or myself, he had taken his socks off and put his boots back on. He never complained once.

I wish I would have enjoyed those toddler/preschool years more instead or worrying so much. I was always SO worried that I wasn't doing it "right," as if there's a manual that tells you how to do it! I remember an older lady at Elim, the first church we attended, telling us "young" moms that her one regret in life was that she wished away each stage in her children's lives, in the anticipation that the next stage would be easier. It wasn't until they were adults that she came to the realization it would never be easy, (because she now worried about the grandkids), and she became painfuly aware of all the time she'd missed out on and could never get back. That would be a very easy thing to do, and something I think most parents are guilty of at one time or another if they're honest about it. I do think I've relaxed considerably in my worries, or maybe the kids are just older and can communicate better so I don't have to do as much guess work. (As if there's no guess work with a 16-year-old!) I still worry, and will probably look back in 10 years and wish I hadn't done so much of it during their Jr. High/High School years. However, I do think I am better able to just BE with our kids and really enjoy them as people. At least I hope I am.

I remember hearing a psychologist speak who said parenting is the one job you want to work yourself out of. I agree with that in terms of the fact that you do need to equip your children with the tools they need to launch. However, I know without a shadow of a doubt that when Caitlin's 50, I'll still be wondering if she is sleeping okay, and when Sam's 50, I'll still worry that he's just going along with things and not asking for what he really wants or needs.

All that being said, now Sam can't say I never blog about him and it's all about Caitlin! I am, if anything, an equal opportunity blogger!